It’s been a while…
I’ve spent the past few years in writing limbo. Sadly, a series of events in my personal life pulled me away from my storytelling. I didn’t completely abandon writing, but I started to drift into a new direction. I learned modern calligraphy, worked on crafts, and even started painting again. Along the way, I followed my heart and took a spiritual journey that would eventually breathe life back into me and my writing.
On The Playlist: I LIVED by One Republic
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I had to make many tough decisions in my life, but one of the toughest ones happened recently. It’s funny how everything you thought you’ve wanted can change, your priorities shift, and you find out that the things that make you happy is really pretty simple.
Writing has been a struggle. Months go by and I can barely squeeze out a page or two. Yet I continue to sit at my desk to will myself to type. Anything. Some days I stare at a blank page and other days I’m fortunate enough to get words down, no matter how crappy they seem in my head. I know if I stop trying to write…I fear I may simply not write. Ever. Again.
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I struggle every day with words.
At one time, I had the ability to crank out up to 50 pages or more in a day! It’s the truth. I could also finish a project in a weekend and work simultaneously on two or three books at the same time. Then life happened. Thus, began the slow decline of my writing schedule. The fire slowly smothered by all the stress and responsibilities, the weight of the world on my shoulders. I’ve tried so hard to get that flame back, just so I can build it up again, turn it into an inferno… Easier said than done.
On The Playlist: TEE SHIRT by Birdy
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I would like to think I’m a pretty resilient person. I’ve lived life struggling more than reaping rewards. Every obstacle I overcome, every mountain I climb… I can only expel a temporary sigh of relief, because I know there’s always something dark lurking just around the corner. Terrible to think this way but if you walked a mile in my shoes you’d understand.
These past few years have taught me a lot about myself. This year especially.
On The Playlist: DRUNK IN LOVE by Beyoncé – Drunk in Love ft. JAY Z
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I’ve been trying to get back into the swing of things. Prioritizing, organizing, productivity, completion… I used to never have a problem with getting things done but the past two years it’s proven to be more difficult than I’d remembered. I currently have several projects that I’m working on simultaneously, so needless to say, they’re all unfinished. There are days I just stare at a blank Word document, and even getting a few paragraphs down is torturous. Writing shouldn’t feel that way…writing has always come easily for me, flowed freely.
I’ve always said I don’t believe in writer’s block…I suppose after much analyzing, I discovered the source of my problems. Focus and Fear. Let me explain…